Raw and Honest

In the morning O Lord, you hear my voice, ...I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.

Psalm 5:3

It's morning Lord and this week I am faced with all sorts of doubts. I mean, we are taking a big risk. Even our social worker makes it sound like the chance of getting picked by a birth family is so slim (being that we have a three month old). However, you are still God despite that. You have laid it on our hearts. We know that in time, whether that time be short or long, you will fulfill that promise. You can see the end already and you know that it is beautiful. I can't wait to see it too God. Just reassure me throughout the wait. Help me to learn trust and patience. I wait in expectation Lord, knowing that you will fulfill!

Sorry for that little off shoot of my blog. It's just what came from my heart this morning. I strive to be raw and honest with all of you so that you can see what is truly in our hearts. This week we ordered our profile books, got the ok on our birth parent letter, reapplied for some grants, and updated our home study. A lot happened and yet I felt so scared this week. I needed to verbalize on paper (or the computer) exactly what God has for us. He brought me to this verse earlier this week and I have been clinging to it steadily ever since. ;)

Anyway, right now Daddy and Zoelle are off on a daddy date (which they try and go on each Saturday morning). I am relaxing while Meridian sleeps...speaking of which, is this not the best picture ever?!?



She actually wasn't sleeping in this pic, rather the sun was in her face. But still, you get a little glimpse into our life with our two daughters and how sweet it is.

Keep praying for us as we start the now official waiting process. It feels like we have been waiting forever, and we have, but now it truly begins. Pray for God to grant us peace and wisdom.

Have a wonderful day! :)

Dear Baby

To my sweet little ________________,

It has been over a year now of officially waiting for you. I hate it! I just want you in my arms to have and to hold forever. I'm sick of waiting. I'm tired of the game. I want you here with your two big sisters. With your mommy to rock you at night and your daddy to hold you gently while you cry. You belong with us. On days, like today, it feels like you are never going to come. God has to keep reminding me that He will bring you to us, it is just in His time.

I thank God that long ago He gave me a vision of you and also a name. It keeps me going day after day. I never stop praying that God would bless your first mom and keep you safe with her while we wait for you. That she would cherish every minute with you and that she would be blessed for this amazing yet hard decision she has to make.

Sweet little __________, God has great plans for you. Of that I am certain. I want, no I need you to know, that I am not giving up. I am prepared to battle for you and that I, your mama, love you with all my heart. I will have the biggest smile on my face the day you are placed in my arms forever. You are already etched into my heart and so I continue to wait for that beautiful day __________.

I love you!

Mommy

Short and Sweet

This is going to be short and sweet as the girls will be up from their naps soon. I also want to get outside to enjoy this beautiful whether once they do wake up. A few of you have been asking me what exactly a family profile is! Great question, and I so wish I would have thought to let you all know sooner. :) It basically is a scrapbook of our life condensed down to about 10-12 pages. Pictures of us, the girls, our house, pets, etc. Each picture also must be explained so potential birth moms that are shown this book know what they are looking at. And....it is also complete! However, I am waiting on the company to get back to me on how I can print off a 10-12 page photo book instead of a 20 page book. Pray they get back to me soon so we can keep this ball rolling.

Blessings to all of you for your continued prayers and I am now off to enjoy the rest of the day with my girls! :D

Complete Peace

All things are possible with God

-Mark 10:27

It is with the knowledge that all things are possible with Him, that we have agreed to pursue this adoption now, not in a year. Do we want to be a "just in case"? No! But God has called us to this adoption, and we don't want to quit on him out of fear of what may or may not happen. He called us to it a year ago, and he will guide us to completing it in His timing. If that means that we need to update our home study more than once and spend more money, then we know that He is the one providing for us in all aspects of the adoption in order to do so.

While both our girls are in bed early this evening, and Chris is at a night job, I thought I would let you all know our decision. We have complete peace about it! Since everyone is either asleep or gone, I now have some time to work on our family profile. Pray that it is easy to complete and not overwhelming!